I've just been perusing Twitter whilst sat in the garden and saw that people are posting a lot of the lines both men and women use. I thought I'd share with you probably the best one I've ever had.
R is a business student at University. Took a year out to work in the Student Union and I was sleeping with him briefly. Lovely guy, a little bit of a cock but I'll forgive him for his sins.
Him - "I never tell you how stunning you are"
Me - "Just 'like' some of my photos on Facebook, it'll keep me happy"
Him - "It's a shame there's not an 'I like you' button"
Ugh. Can anyone better that with something more vomit inducing?
Friday, 29 May 2009
And here is what I've learnt about men...
First, a little bit about myself.
I'm Rebecca. I'm 21, and a student. 3 years at 6th form, 2 failed first years at Hull University. I'm still not overly sure what I want to do with my life, and I'm not too sure how to even get to that point. I'm your average 21 year old woman. Too much shopping, too much drinking, too many men.
Based upon my several failed relationships, with whom I thought were amazing men, I've decided to keep a blog based upon my adventures (or misadventures, whatever) in love.
Here's a brief run down of my past relationships...
A - I was 15, he was 20. Bad, bad, bad idea from the start. Immature, "can't live without you", melodramatic, just completely unhealthy. Spent 18 months with him, lost my virginity, started 6th form and quickly realised there was a whole world of men out there. I recieved the ubquitous "I'll never love anyone like I loved you" letters, but by that point I'd already moved on to...
D - With absolutely no disrespect to the guy; what was I doing?! D was about 6ft4, a little bit socially awkward, and completely jealous of every other boy I happened to speak to. It lasted just under 3 months.
K - K was my boyfriend for 9 months. We first bonded over a shared love of indie music, and it blossomed from there. K was everything a budding little rock journalist could want in a boyfriend; good looking, a fantastic musician, great taste in music. However, jealousy got the better of me this time and after a drunken argument I kissed and had a horrible fumble with his friend, IA. Things were never really the same, and after a messy break-up, several drunken arguments in nightclubs and various sniping texts, we eventually put aside our differences and now spend our time bickering over the Facebook game Farm Town.
LW - Where do we begin... I went out with LW for just under 2 years. LW was the shining star of Media and Film production at our 6th form, and painfully shy. I first began speaking to him when he (briefly) dated a friend of mine, B. Soon after they "split" (I use quotation marks as I'm not sure it ever really counted as a relationship), I began seeing him. A female faux pa, I know, but there we go. It was all very innocent and sweet at the start. Despite neither of us being virgins, we didn't have sex until we'd be going out around 5 months. And at first it was lovely... Until we both discovered drink and self confidence. Nasty arguments turned into violent fights, and after several bruises, cuts and scrapes, LW ran off with a friend of mine, LCS. They're still together now - needless to say, I'm not overly bothered. I was heartbroken at the time, however, he's now grown his hair and resembles a stalk of broccoli, and they spend all their time getting stoned together.
T - After my initial upset at LW's betrayal, I swore myself off men for a good while. Until I agreed to go for a drink with T, a guy who worked on the checkout alongside me at Asda. Not a bad guy, but exaggerated his sex life a bit too much: "I've had sex with 50 birds" great claim, until you can't get it up with your girlfriend for the first few times you have sex. I later found out the 50 was actually 2, including myself... Spent all his time bragging about how he cheated on his ex (great way to build trust!), and his stuck up family hated me. Naughty me, I ended up kissing LW after a night out and that relationship went down the toilet. After he returned the teddy I bought him for his birthday, complete with the head ripped off, I completely changed my life. Moved out of my parents' into my own place, and found a whole new wealth of men waiting for me at University.
LK - Oh dear. LK was a lovely guy. I met him through the American Football team, who's president was my housemate. Things were perfect - we got along well, we had the same interests, we made each other happy. Then he dropped a bombshell. A year previously, he'd been driving home from an ice hockey game during the early hours of the morning, fell asleep at the wheel and crashed into an oncoming car, killing the other driver. He loved me and wanted to be with me, but would I wait for him while he went to prison? I (stupidly) agreed, and found myself weeping in the public gallery at the start of 2009. He was sentenced to 18 months, and is released in September. After 3 months of him being in prison I decided I couldn't do it - after all, we'd only been together 5 months in total anyway. Things ended well at first, with us staying friends, until he found out that I'd been sleeping with someone at University. Once this was revealed, I found that he was writing letters to our friends asking them to choose between us, and getting his minions (best friend who is clearly besotted with him and needlessly arrogant little sister) to send me lovely abusive emails. Ho hum!
And here we are now! Whilst a relationship is not really something I'm looking for, I'm quite interested in dating and seeing who is out there. I think I could possibly learn some vital lessons... or just have a lot of fun on the way.
I'm Rebecca. I'm 21, and a student. 3 years at 6th form, 2 failed first years at Hull University. I'm still not overly sure what I want to do with my life, and I'm not too sure how to even get to that point. I'm your average 21 year old woman. Too much shopping, too much drinking, too many men.
Based upon my several failed relationships, with whom I thought were amazing men, I've decided to keep a blog based upon my adventures (or misadventures, whatever) in love.
Here's a brief run down of my past relationships...
A - I was 15, he was 20. Bad, bad, bad idea from the start. Immature, "can't live without you", melodramatic, just completely unhealthy. Spent 18 months with him, lost my virginity, started 6th form and quickly realised there was a whole world of men out there. I recieved the ubquitous "I'll never love anyone like I loved you" letters, but by that point I'd already moved on to...
D - With absolutely no disrespect to the guy; what was I doing?! D was about 6ft4, a little bit socially awkward, and completely jealous of every other boy I happened to speak to. It lasted just under 3 months.
K - K was my boyfriend for 9 months. We first bonded over a shared love of indie music, and it blossomed from there. K was everything a budding little rock journalist could want in a boyfriend; good looking, a fantastic musician, great taste in music. However, jealousy got the better of me this time and after a drunken argument I kissed and had a horrible fumble with his friend, IA. Things were never really the same, and after a messy break-up, several drunken arguments in nightclubs and various sniping texts, we eventually put aside our differences and now spend our time bickering over the Facebook game Farm Town.
LW - Where do we begin... I went out with LW for just under 2 years. LW was the shining star of Media and Film production at our 6th form, and painfully shy. I first began speaking to him when he (briefly) dated a friend of mine, B. Soon after they "split" (I use quotation marks as I'm not sure it ever really counted as a relationship), I began seeing him. A female faux pa, I know, but there we go. It was all very innocent and sweet at the start. Despite neither of us being virgins, we didn't have sex until we'd be going out around 5 months. And at first it was lovely... Until we both discovered drink and self confidence. Nasty arguments turned into violent fights, and after several bruises, cuts and scrapes, LW ran off with a friend of mine, LCS. They're still together now - needless to say, I'm not overly bothered. I was heartbroken at the time, however, he's now grown his hair and resembles a stalk of broccoli, and they spend all their time getting stoned together.
T - After my initial upset at LW's betrayal, I swore myself off men for a good while. Until I agreed to go for a drink with T, a guy who worked on the checkout alongside me at Asda. Not a bad guy, but exaggerated his sex life a bit too much: "I've had sex with 50 birds" great claim, until you can't get it up with your girlfriend for the first few times you have sex. I later found out the 50 was actually 2, including myself... Spent all his time bragging about how he cheated on his ex (great way to build trust!), and his stuck up family hated me. Naughty me, I ended up kissing LW after a night out and that relationship went down the toilet. After he returned the teddy I bought him for his birthday, complete with the head ripped off, I completely changed my life. Moved out of my parents' into my own place, and found a whole new wealth of men waiting for me at University.
LK - Oh dear. LK was a lovely guy. I met him through the American Football team, who's president was my housemate. Things were perfect - we got along well, we had the same interests, we made each other happy. Then he dropped a bombshell. A year previously, he'd been driving home from an ice hockey game during the early hours of the morning, fell asleep at the wheel and crashed into an oncoming car, killing the other driver. He loved me and wanted to be with me, but would I wait for him while he went to prison? I (stupidly) agreed, and found myself weeping in the public gallery at the start of 2009. He was sentenced to 18 months, and is released in September. After 3 months of him being in prison I decided I couldn't do it - after all, we'd only been together 5 months in total anyway. Things ended well at first, with us staying friends, until he found out that I'd been sleeping with someone at University. Once this was revealed, I found that he was writing letters to our friends asking them to choose between us, and getting his minions (best friend who is clearly besotted with him and needlessly arrogant little sister) to send me lovely abusive emails. Ho hum!
And here we are now! Whilst a relationship is not really something I'm looking for, I'm quite interested in dating and seeing who is out there. I think I could possibly learn some vital lessons... or just have a lot of fun on the way.
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